Thursday, 13 March 2014

So It's Come To This

I found this recently and, to be honest, even though I don't go out much (and never go out at night anymore) I have actually found myself feeling like this. It's not really a great thing to feel. I've noticed people I'm walking behind actually picking up speed sometimes. I've considered crossing the road to avoid walking behind someone, and then found myself thinking that if I did that, I might actually somehow come across as more rapey. Like I was crossing the street to make her feel more comfortable so that it would be easier to follow her.

I can kind of understand where a woman is coming from in this situation too. I saw a woman comment that one time she was walking down the street and a guy behind her crossed the road. She said she felt very comfortable when he did, and the same is also true of me. Given my sociophobic tendencies, I can feel like everyone on a street I walk down is out to get me. When I notice someone is walking behind me, I get very very tense and nervous. Sometimes I might pick up my pace or actually cross the road.

I don't really know what I'm trying to say in all this. I guess I'm just trying to say that we've reached a point where men are made uncomfortable just for being men. It's very, very difficult to try and preach a man's rights, or to go for actual equality. I urge everyone to drop all their preconceived notions; about themselves and about other people. Some men really are that self conscious about themselves and act like this, and I think we all need to be able to walk down the street safely and without fear, even of how we might be perceived.

5 comments:

  1. I can definitely understand from a woman's point of view feeling uncomfortable with a man walking behind her at night. Something we just have to accept and understand as men.

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  2. When I go running in the neighborhood at night I wear a hoodie, and I'm sure I probably look like a very nimble rapist. I just try to stay away from people so I don't give them a scare. And it's not just women. I've been asked by some guy trying to be a white knight, "What are you doing? Are you up to no good?" to which I replied, "Yes, I'm going to rob someone or maybe rape someone, but I haven't decided who yet, which is why I've been running in circles for the past hour."

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  3. But honestly, most of the time, people are too busy getting all paranoid about themselves to actually give a rat's ass about you. That, or they don't really care for you to begin with. Sounds rough, but hey, there's a ton of people in the world. Can't be expected to pay attention to all of 'em, eh?

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  4. Well, I am that way, as far as avoiding social interaction at all costs sometimes, either because I don't want to bother somebody, or I am just not feeling up to being sociable. It's kind of hard to make friends that way though.

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  5. I have no experience with this, seeing as I spend so much time indoors and I don't like being outside.

    It can't be pleasant for either party honestly.

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